01
Last night was slow. There was no food in the house minus mac & cheese, soup and other soft matter — and Carla (the girlfriend) was a little disappointed in that. You gotta figure though, is this really my fault? I mean, what else have I been able to eat for the past several days? We finally settled on some good old Campbell’s tomato, after the agreement was made that I would hit the grocery store tonight while she was at work - so that when she got off her ’till midnight shift, something would be here waiting for her.
Adrian also came by last night. After facing his block and his little mini anxiety attack, he found himself plopped down on my couch and rambling meaningless nothings out of exhaustion. Carla and him executed their little rapport as they always do … ‘Hi Epiphany’ … ‘Hi Carla’ … ‘Hi Epiphany’ … ‘Hi Carla’ … ‘Hi Epiphany’ … ‘Hi Carla’ … this literally goes on for minutes - sometimes I wonder if it’ll last indefinitely - and whether it’s in person, over the phone or at the bar it never fails. The ‘Epiphany’ is a pet name Carla granted to Adrian very early on, after it became apparent to her that Adrian often experiences moments of clarity and focus after peeing. Adrian pees a lot.
As I’m at the computer troubleshooting RSS, their conversation turned even more interesting as Carla expressed something that happened the other night that I’d completely forgotten about. Apparently I’d said something along the lines of ‘you should have my last name’ the other night and Carla had figured that it was some sort of slip due to my fuzzy cloud of hydrocodone. I took a few minutes trying to figure out what my context had been when I said it but I was failing. After a few moments of Carla explaining the scenario to Adrian I was able to connect to the memory and understand what I was talking about:
After leaving Starbucks the other night Carla and I had launched into a discussion about how regardless of how early she intends to leave, how hard she tries to arrive on time, she always tends to be late somehow - most lately attributed to the collection of pot holes around her work that are called a road. As this phenomena is kind of built in to my family as well (the McIntires), I said, heh ‘you should have my last name’ — without considering how loaded the statement was. I tried to explain this … but it got me in further trouble and Adrian let me know that I wasn’t helping myself any and I should shut up.
So, I was caught. Dammit. There still isn’t any real food here. But I did find some cinnamon rolls and here I go to put them in the oven…
2:26 pm
Mar 01 2008
… and suddenly that commercial where the guy’s car dies on him in front of a jewelry store … just as the girlfriend is talking about marriage … comes to mind.
There is no easy way of backing out of a statement like that, is there?
Sorry … I should be sympathetic … but I can’t help finding this amusing, as it falls into that “only you” category.
Though, if you have any hopes at all of redeeming yourself, I’d suggest you get your ass to that grocery store pronto. The site will still be here when you get back.